Perform or Perish..! 

"Perform or Perish!"  Praful Patel, Civil Aviation Minister Union members and other staff of a national carrier are extremely upset with the aviation minister for advising them to either perform or perish:

"How much more can one perform," grumbled a very senior airhostess, her grey eyebrows arched angrily in the direction of the nation's capital, "I perform everyday as wife, mother and grandmother and now he expects me to perform in my job? I buy clothes for my children from Bangkok, take booze back for my husband from the flight bar, chocolates for my grandchildren from duty free and save allowance money for my retirement by cooking in my hotel room; tell me, how much more can I perform?"

A male flight steward who overheard the airhostess grumbling came over and stood next to her, "How much more can I perform," he joined in. "I scowl at old passengers so they will load their own luggage, serve vegetarian food to the non-vegetarians, non veg to the veggies, tell people their headphones don't work and tell freezing passengers there are no blankets on board! How much more can I perform?"

A pilot who was entering his cockpit stood next to the very senior air- hostess and the very senior flight purser, "How much more can I perform?" he yelled, making the old hostess and the aged purser jump, "I have to tip the breathalyzer fellow when I have a drink and nearly kill myself as I pilot the plane drunk, I face divorce proceedings for fooling around with pretty stewards and have to work out ways to invest all this extra cash I have! How much more can I perform?"

"A union leader, who was in charge of the loaders, fitters and other non- flying crew came and stood next to the three, "How much more can I perform?" he shrieked and smiled as the pilot, the steward and aged airhostess, covered their ears.

"I have struck work for wages, highest in the world for men who can stay at home because there are no planes to maintain, I have gone on strike to reduce working hours, gone on strike to stop privatization, and gone on strike, just to go on strike! How much more can I perform?"

The four employees of the national carrier stood together and sang in agonized harmony:

Minister, minister what do you want, what did you say?

Minister, minister, see how we work, both night and day!

We've performed so much oh ministerji, can't you just see?

So perish the thought,

Yes perish the thought,

Please perish the thought

Of ever ministerji, increasing our efficiency..!