The atmosphere of a court of law is perhaps the most dull and monotonous. A layman cannot just comprehend the many technicalities, the tactical niceties and the hair-splitting commonly associated with these temples of justice. The only redeeming feature is the occasional humorous episodes that cause great amusement and laughter in law courts. The battles of wit could be between lawyers and judges, lawyers and lawyers or between lawyers and witnesses. Such encounters have a generous sprinkling of humour thrown in—deliberate or otherwise.

Admittedly, humour is a valuable weapon in the armoury of those present in the law courts, including the witnesses. At times, the lack of it, however, can raise a laugh against those unfortunate souls.

The court room is often likened to a stage with the judge, the lawyer and the litigant as the leading lights of the play. Declared Marshall Hall once: "My profession and that of an actor are somewhat akin, except that I have no stage props to help me, and no words are written for me to say. There is no backdrop to increase the illusion and there is no curtain. But out of the vivid living drama of somebody else’s life, I have to create an atmosphere—for that is advocacy." The judges and lawyers have been much maligned creatures since long. There was a time when it was said of a lawyer that his was the culture of the vulture and that he thrived on disputes. It is said that there are three stages a lawyer passes through—he gets on, then gets honour and lastly, after he has made his pile, he gets honest!

About lawyers, Gladstone used to say: " They are always more ready to get a man into trouble than out of it."

There is an interesting story about a Duke. A poor lawyer died. There were not sufficient funds to give the deceased a decent burial. Some of his well-wishers and colleagues approached the Duke and requested him for a handsome donation.

"For what purpose," the Duke asked.

"We want to bury a lawyer," was the prompt reply.

The Duke brooded over the matter for some time and then asked: "How much do you want?" "Please give us 20 pounds, Sir," they said. Instead of 20 ponds, the Duke generously gave 40 pounds and said gravely: "Bury two, instead of one."

Well, these stories may be apocryphal. But they do provide the necessary good humour. The court rooms are, of course, the place which have ample scope for generating humour in massive doses. Here is a fascinating story of a judge who was not very alert to the arguments advanced at the bar. The judge then suddenly noticed that a donkey had begun braying outside the court room. He inquired: "What is this noise?"

Pat came the reply from the lawyer arguing that case: "Sir, this is the echo of the court."

The witty retort elicited laughter in the court room. The judge became more attentive thereafter.

Soon he got the better of the lawyer. The donkey began braying again and the judge comically remarked: "Please, don’t both of you speak at the same time."

An eloquent example of witticism is told of a judge. Mr. Justice Maule was known for his sarcasm and arrogant temper. As a barrister, he had to plead before Judge Tanton, known for his brusqueness by the nickname, ‘Bear’. "You are talking like a child, Mr. Maule," said the impolite judge irritatingly, "just like a child." Looking straight at the judge, Maule said with utmost gravity: "I don’t resent being likened to a child, for a child, if spared, becomes in the process of time a man, and not a bear, My Lord, always a brute." Once an eminent advocate was arguing a case before a judge who had risen from the bar. The judge was in the habit of snubbing his erstwhile colleagues. One day, while a case was being argued, the lawyer referred to a book of which there was only one copy, which was the one in his hands. The judge asked for it and it was passed on to him. While going through the book, he found a bug. Addressing the lawyer, he said: "There is a bug in your book." The latter replied at once: "Sir, it is one of those ambitious bugs which have gone from the bar to the bench."

Unpremeditated humour often sends the audience into peals of laughter.

"Once Pandit Motilal Nehru had a witty encounter with a witness. When exasperated by some inconvenient questions at the time of cross examination, the witness said to the legal counsel: "You are mistaken." And he continued in an angry tone: "Sir, do you think I am a fool?" Motilal Nehru quietly retorted: "Why, no." and then after a pause, added: "But, of course, I may be mistaken." It was a devastating stroke and its affect was manifest.
Before electric fans came in vogue, pankhas used to be tied to long ropes which were constantly pulled by a coolie. On one hot sultry day in the Madras High Court, the judge went to sleep. The late Mr. Norton, who was arguing the case before him, found himself in an awkward situation. It so happened that the pankha coolie was also enjoying a nap. Mr. Norton felt very annoyed. He thumped the table with his books, as a result of which both the umbrella coolie and the judge woke up with a start.

The judge asked the counsel: "Why, what’s the matter?" Mr. Norton’s crushing retort had telling effect. He replied: "Oh, nothing, my Lord.—it is only the impertinence of the coolie to think that he can go to sleep in the open court, as if he is also a judge."

Sometimes, an affable insolence heard in the court relieved the tedium of the law.

The story goes of a prisoner who was an old offender not unknown to the judge who was trying him.

"It is time you checked your career of crime," said the judge. "How many times have you been convicted of this offence before?"

"Five," was the man’s unruffled reply.

"Five," said the judge. "Then this time I shall give you the maximum sentence laid down by the law."

"Maximum!" echoed the prisoner. "Don’t regular customers get a bit of discount?"